Here are 7 Signs Your Dealing With a Clingy Partner

Everyone likes to have their own space, even in a relationship. Spending time together is one of the greatest joys in a partnership, but having time to yourself is something that all people need, even if you love being around your significant other. Sometimes, though, our partners can hang around a little too much. Being clingy has a whole host of negative connotations, and you may not notice it until it becomes a problem, or when someone else points it out to you.

Having a clingy partner can cause issues in the relationship, even if you love them and understand where they’re coming from, whether it be abandonment issues or low self-esteem. Knowing the important signs that your partner is too clingy will help you be able to address the issue and deal with it before it starts to cause problems in the relationship.

HERE ARE 7 SIGNS YOU’RE DEALING WITH A CLINGY PARTNER

THEY’RE ALWAYS TEXTING / CALLING YOU This is one of the earliest and most obvious signs that your partner is far too clingy. The minute you two are apart they are texting you, constantly. They seem to get distressed or uncomfortable if they don’t know where you are or don’t have access to talk to you whenever they want to. If you’re out with your friends, you may notice that they’re constantly sending you messages and making sure that they’re always in contact with you.

WHEN YOU DON’T RESPOND, THEY BECOME DISTRESSED If they send you a text message and you don’t respond within a certain period, it may cause them to get distressed, nervous or upset. The reasons for this can be varied: they may catastrophize a situation, or they may be worried you’re angry with them or they’re insecure.

THEY’RE FAR TOO INTERESTED IN YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA If your partner likes to look at your Instagram, or tags you in things on Facebook, this isn’t too much of an issue. However, if they’re starting to dig through your social media and begin to ask you invasive questions about a comment that you received on an old Instagram post, or questioning the people you have on your friend's list, it may be a sign your partner is a little too nervous and clingy. Discussing with them honestly what their fears are and why they feel the need to dig so much can help get to the bottom of the feeling that is driving the behaviour.

THEY HATE WHEN YOU GO OUT WITHOUT THEM

Sometimes, people in relationships have different sets of friends. If your partner becomes upset or distressed when you go out with your friends without them, this is a red flag that your partner is a little too clingy – especially if you only go out occasionally, and they get upset every time. This could be due to your partner not having the same type of support system or friend circle. They may be feeling left out if they don’t go out as much. Encouraging them to find a group of friends that they can go out with will make them feel more at ease when you leave the house.

THEY ADOPT ALL YOUR INTERESTS … AND DROP THEIR OWN An overly clingy partner will want to have as much in common with you as possible, even if this means abandoning things that they once enjoyed adopting your interests, even if they don’t like them.

Again, why?

That’s because “the basis around clinginess is the fear of not being loved and not being enough,” says Bernardo Mendez, a relationship coach for women.

The best way to handle this is to encourage your partner to continue to do the things that they like and even engage in them with them. An overly clingy partner will want you to be the centre of their world – and sometimes they have to be shown that you’re not!

THEY HOLD BACK THEIR FEELINGS OR OPINIONS

Clingy partners tend to be extremely self-conscious or have low self-esteem. This can result in them holding back their true opinions, or allowing your worldview to become their own. Clingy partners tend to do this to make sure that they don’t drive their partners away. Making sure that your partner feels safe expressing their political, religious or social beliefs around you can alleviate this desire to change their opinions to match your own.

THEY’RE MORE INTO YOU THAN YOU ARE INTO them this is a tough one to deal with. If you’re dating someone casually, it may be clear that they’re far more into you than you are into them.

Making sure you set boundaries early in the relationship, if it’s a casual one, will make it so that your partner doesn’t expect too much out of you, or expect more than you’re willing to put forward. It sucks when the lines of a relationship aren’t clearly drawn.

Final thoughts

If your significant other shows signs of being overly clingy, but you still care about them and want to keep the relationship going, it’s important to make sure that you communicate and draw clear boundaries. If your partner crosses those boundaries repeatedly, it may be best to let the relationship go. But, there’s an equally high chance that communication and understanding will help turn a relationship around and make it much more balanced.