How to Get Out of Bad Relationships and Restore Your Independence

Toxic relationships are those which are damaging to use. A toxic person will often be controlling, negative self-cantered and dominant.

Why Run From Toxic Relationships?

There are so many reasons to free yourself from toxic relationships in your life. Negative people encourage negative actions and behaviours. They can cause anxiety and stress responses, are unhelpful to us and our relationships and don’t foster a healthy attitude.

Here’s how to spot and prevent toxic behaviour in yourself and others.

Distance yourself from toxic people

Toxic relationships drain our

positivity, self-esteem and willpower. They make us feel empty and tired and cloud our judgement of experiences and surroundings.

Consider your relationships – are there any that you feel are more negative than positive? Perhaps someone who is overly controlling, critical or needy? It might be time to distance yourself from this person to gain a better perspective on your own life.

Let go of resentment and forgive

Grudges and resentment grow stronger the more time we give them. The only thing giving them power is us. If you can overcome resentment, let it go and gain closure, you will find you have more time and space to cultivate positivity.

Accept imperfections

No one is perfect and we shouldn’t expect this in ourselves or others. A person’s ability to accept the imperfections of themselves and life directly correlates with well-being and happiness. Don’t try and control things that are out of your remit – it will only serve to make you more stressed. Instead, try and embrace life’s imperfect nature.

Be mindful

Mindfulness helps us be more conscious and aware of what our mind is doing. How often do you find yourself replaying an angry conversation or planning one? How many times have you suddenly realised you’ve spent the last half hour ruminating on a negative situation or person?

Being more aware of what you’re spending your time thinking about allows you to stop focusing on negative things and replace them with positivity and goodwill. You will find that this also warms other people to you as they sense your carefree and kind attitude.

Cultivate healthy mindset

There are some things that almost always lead us down the path of negativity and toxicity. Fear and anxiety are not always healthy if the things you’re worrying about are out of your control. “What if” statements are almost always negative. We should replace these with thoughts about positive outcomes and our hopes for the future.

It’s also healthy to stop caring too much about what others think of you. We only need to worry about our actions, values and morals. Who cares if Julie from accounts doesn’t think that shirt matches your shoes?

Stop complaining

A small amount of complaining can be cathartic but too much stops us from seeing the positive things in life. Try to limit your complaining and instead focus on what you’re thankful for.

Do what you love

A lot of negativity in our lives can come from our jobs, relationships or even our surroundings. Spend as much time doing things you love – whether that’s a new job, hobby or relaxation. Pay attention to your surroundings, declutter and do what you can to make them positive, calming spaces that energise rather than drain.

Add positivity

The final step is to replace negativity with positivity. The mind is like a computer that can be reprogrammed to behave differently. The more you practise positivity, the more it will become your go-to response. Visualisation and reframing exercises are effective tools for doing this.

Hypnotherapy & Psychotherapy for Toxic Relationships

Hypnotherapy is a powerful tool for change. It helps us understand why we feel and behave the way we do, and it is often undervalued in its ability to heal the mind from past hurts. It can support us in developing new ways of thinking, especially in the treatment of trauma from toxic relationships. Cognitive Hypnotherapy can help release tightly held emotions tied to traumatic events and limiting beliefs. Using tailored techniques, can eliminate anxiety and stress triggers, leading to a more positive future, improved self-image, enhanced self-esteem, increased determination, and the ability to set healthy boundaries in relationships.