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Mastering Emotions

How to Become Master of Your Emotions ? This is a question I’m frequently asked. Our emotions serving an important purpose. Moreover fear alerts us to danger. Guilt letting us know we might have behaved badly. And anger protects us against mistreatment. However, sometimes our emotions take over. As a result, ruling our minds and governing our behaviour.

It doesn’t have to be this way. Emotional intelligence helps in mastering your own emotions. As well as understanding and expressing emotions more clearly. The benefits include less stress and anxiety. Moreover improving relationships and success at work

Tips for Mastering Your Emotions

  1. Slowing Down

Firstly to




identify and process emotions we need to slow down.  If you’re becoming overwhelmed by your emotions, the temptation is to speed up. But this extra activity doesn’t always help. Slow down, calm yourself and focus.

  1. Listening to Your Body

Are the physical effects of emotions making you feel out of control? Causing sweating, nausea, overheating, muscle tension and headaches. It’s important to recognise these physical symptoms and react accordingly. Waiting for them to subside before making any decisions with a clear head.

  1. Acting Consciously

Often strong emotions cause us to give in to automatic reactions. Start making an effort to react consciously. Thus avoiding heat-of-the-moment weakness. You can’t always control your emotions. But you can control how you‘re reacting to them.

  1. Recognising Conditioning

Do you tend to deal with certain emotions in the same way? Perhaps you eat when you’re sad? Or lash out when you’re angry. Early experiences condition us to deal with emotions in specific ways. Especially if you have experienced a difficult childhood.

  1. Challenging Negativity

Your thoughts give the strength of your negative emotions. Or bringing them under control. A small niggle becomes overwhelming when left unchecked. For example, after a small setback feeling sad, angry and disappointed. These emotions give rise to negative self-talk – “I’ll never make it”, “I’m so useless”.

These are examples of all-or-nothing thinking, mind reading and extreme negativity. Operating in this way strengthens negative emotions.

  1. Responding Positively  

What’s the best way of responding to a setback? Start by focusing on what you’re feeling and why. Are you disappointed because you didn’t get a job. Or angry that you missed an opportunity. A better way is to make sure you separate feelings from facts. As well as focusing on the positive. As well as learning from your experiences.

7. Asking yourself

Ask yourself why are you so upset. Is it because you’ve wasted effort?  What can get you back on track? Life coaching is very effective at helping people work through emotions. As well as planning for the future. In addition, focusing on dealing with negative emotions healthily as they arise.

8. Handling Complex Emotions

Complex emotions can be confusing. As a result, avoiding dealing with them. Try taking a step back and unpicking everything you’re feeling. It may help to talk to someone about what you’re feeling. Avoid magnifying or minimising things. Learn to recognise that what you’re feeling, doesn’t always represent reality. Emotions are complex and unpredictable. There is no ‘right’ way of feeling.

  1. Learning to Express Your Emotions

Talking about feelings is a healthy way to process your emotions. There are many ways of expressing your feelings clearly whilst avoiding making judgments on others. Use “I” statements. Inviting others to share their feelings when appropriate. And avoiding any ‘should’ and ‘ought’ statements.

Seeking Professional Help

Sometimes. even after trying your best to control your emotions, you’re still feeling overwhelmed. I use hypnotherapy and life coaching to help build confidence and master their own emotions. If you would like to benefit from this too, please do get in touch.


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